Boundary passing: Notion #3

Residential parking lawns, open roads, concrete pavements, dusty streets and diverging branches of paths were bustling. Along the numerous tiny huts and crude set-up camps of various local shops was the huge sidewalk zone which was entirely occupied with thousands of people, every afternoon. The air was as dry as an empty aquarium with a running vacuum in it, and the sun beamed uncontrollably hot that day. I knew for sure a tan on all over my face and arms would differ much of my skin when I look at myself in the mirror, right after the zesty visit at the bazaar in Sarikin.


When some of the other families of the convoy were about to leave the bazaar, my family and I had just arrived shortly after some delays that happened in the morning departures (Mom needed to exchange her money into local currencies and the annoying part was there wasn't much Money Changers in here)


         Anyway....


The people here were many, as I mentioned. Majority of them were locals, but the tourists weren't left little in fact there were also a lot of them, especially from Brunei!


When I appeared with a sudden temptation to flee back to the car, because the heat in the air was irritatingly blinding, I stumbled upon an old friend. He looked as bald as how he usually have become ever since long before he transferred to another high school, and that was the time I became as distant as a fading daylight reaching to the grounds, to him.


Despite all that had lost, I've taken the chance to actually share our news respectively. Likewise, he told me that he had departed from Brunei since Friday. Regardless of being notably annoying, it had been a long time I haven't seen him since then.. without anything to know about each other's updates. And the ever similar thing before that happened was I having the need to talk to someone who I've known being in the same school like I was. Currently, it may feel terrible.. but routinely, it's a mere tradition to worry about.


Then I parted from my fellow and resumed whatever the survey my mom was doing. Round and round, from smaller shops to bigger shops on both sides, left and right, then to another smaller ones. At the far end of the market looked pretty much denser when I saw even more people appeared out of the blue from a point of sight. I could have tell that a horde of shoppers came from an exodus from an endless source out of nowhere.


As far as I was concerned, I believed that this survey was gonna be a never-ending phase of the vacation time, under the sun.

Speaking of the survey, the markets around there were selling varieties of items and merchandises. Most of the shops were selling one type of variety of those which comprises stalls selling glasses and shades, cutleries, bags, accessories, shirts and dresses, pyjamas, boxers and lingeries, food and drinks, traditional medicines, garishly inexpensive music instruments (especially the traditional ones), hardwares, homewares, woven baskets, flowers and ornamental plants and even children's toys.



Counting how many shops I could count was already as tiring as walking into every each one of them, just to ease up a slight boredom that was slowly growing in myself.

But everything started to cheer up things in here..
when I came across a toy stall where there was this little girl involved.

She was cute. Silky-smooth long haired. Fair skin. Hazel coloured candy eyes and the best thing was she was adorably tiny. As tiny as any lovely youngster you could've imagined that you wished she was your little angel.



When there she was with her mother's hand in hers, she had this bubble blower in the other. Lovely as it was to see those sphere-shaped sparkles floating across the path zone and its ever appealing gleam from that thing. I stood lowly among the passing crowd and surprised to notice the rather amusing and pleasant fun that later began to gain attention to the local children and caused a widespread interest to them and I. Besides their poverty-looking behaviours, the children were amazed as the little girl's frolics with, seemingly, the only toy them young folks would probably find that entertaining.


That very enthusiasm from the children...
made me feel greatly rejoiced. Pleased by every sight of the glimmering bubbles,
                                                      swiftly floating under the bright heavenly sky.

This had went for like another 5 minutes, that I stayed rigid, looking at it.

The tiny group were having a blast altogether until the girl's mother broke out the fun for them. I pretty guessed it that it would end any sooner. And how miraculously funny it was for the crowd of local children waving back to the girl who seemed so caring, she might have thought that she'll be back to play with them again once more. The mother cracked a smile as well and then exited to the left, along with her daughter who left happily after.

 Gosh.

All I must say was that it had been painfully enlightening to see such proximity having an amusement amidst a place where I thought I would leave without something to put up with my boring visit.


You had no idea for me to describe that..

..all of my worries have now vanished like a pop of a bubble..

 

Boundary passing: Notion #2

The moment when we left the gas station somewhere along some driveway, the feeling as I wait while being in the Cruiser resembled into some sort of a sensation, involuntary by the background to the eye, that I found familiar with..


I first realized it as I opened the car door and then spotted the old black leather bag, which I used to bring with me to somewhere I've had gone to most of my past lifetime, right next to my seat. This perpetually gave me the impression of an awkward look right after I got into the seat, with the bag now on the lap of mine. I held the bag.. and slowly it recalled what seemed to be the things that I did almost everyday before the usual arrival to a destination - School.


I felt alive again after a lapse of ten minutes, just contemplating what ambiance like that was giving me. Unmistakably, sitting there, I visualized a flashback. The notion clung to my mind as it was so remarkably worth the reminisce.

Back then, every morning when it was time for School, the bag had to be on my lap and just deserved some clutching of books and files filled inside the bag, around my arms, and wishing it was as comfortable as how a bed feels like, where my disfunctional sleeps belong to. It's routinely an occurrence to have my sleeps deprived during the night and also receiving in turn its unkind feedbacks in the following morning.

In the present time, I was having one of those feedbacks again along with some uncommon issues -- a peculiar feeling in the stomach combined with twinges of motion sickness. Despite of all those, it felt uncanny yet welcoming as I realized that all these had happened recently when facing myself against the wind from the air conditioner on the left. It felt so familiar. My mind riveted back to the old memories again - the morning departures for School.


Usually right after I got inside the car, I front my dull bored eyes with my damp hair towards the air conditioner, reaching to the chilly air where it was blown, merely to find a sort of entertainment in cooling down my face. I even imagined how would the birds feel to the powerful gust just hitting right onto their faces as they soar. How can they not feel tensed from all that? All I ever aspire is to be as carefree as them. Just forgetting the world around you while stubbornly fly onward, leaving behind the vile and old, to the uncovering of the new greatness in the open vasts.


Sorry for the sidetracking.


Then things started to feel sad. The occurring day lapsed for four hour long of me missing the school years I've had along with so many sincere people I've met in my life, in the next journey stopping by at Mukah. The feeling of expatriate suppressed onto the notion I was having.

Strained, I had to cut this out.

7.58pm ; arrived

Boundary passing: Prequel

2 in the morning, or somewhere before that..


I was in my ever so-cluttered bedroom, and amidst all the hectic work that not only took over the equanimity in the tiny place but also the whole kitchen, living rooms, the small hallway upstairs, and my parents' bedroom, I laid still and restless. Even if there were more things that needed to be packed up, I could scarcely urge myself to do so. I was too disinclined to help it, besides knowing that I never want to strain the whole of me from such a preparation.



Unlike my busy Mom hurling with the empty baggages to and fro in a way like she's in a foot race while stuffing shirts, jeans, pajamas, her veils and her lingeries necessarily inside it. Not forgetting the kitchenwares, she usually handles it all with care specifically for those that involves with 'food' and 'necessities'. It doesn't bother me that much or that often, not only if I couldn't take an effort to do the same thing for my own.


Anyways.. I could see how virtually devoted I am with social sites and online entertainments, regardless. By courtesy of my Dad who installed the router for our home, I thank him (and it) for permitting me to seize the opportunity. That was why I spent time, instead of readying, giving several greetings through the Internet to the people whom I'll miss seeing them available on the line. Knowingly the impending chances of being incapable to stay 'available' as them, may arrive to come about afterwards, I spent the whole night until the last hour before dawn took over, and before the departure.


I began to feel even more reluctant to pack up my luggage for not only that.


Before this, Dad has been practically occupied with his hands all on our ever-similar Land Cruiser. Traditionally, the large hefty automobile used for any road trips and is capable to keep a bulk full of suitcases when a set of long, arduous, maybe strenuous days hits our stuffs into the back of the car and get ourselves strapped onto the seats to set off for, nonetheless, an adventuresome vacation around Kalimantan.


Yes, it was finally happening.. again. My parents and I hadn't had a week-long vacation that recently, until friends of Dad agreed with him to venture about. The last one was since a year ago, coincidently occurred in the same month as this trip.



I could say, December has a way to offer its time of the month ordinarily for us to take relieves, if that was from a someone, comforting me. But ironically I couldn't see that intention laid precisely to our resolution. In fact, most of the time that I encountered were just more additions to one's fatigue. I knew that I might sound pessimistic, but admittedly it's just.. discombobulating and amusing altogether to one's mind like mine.


You see.. for me, I got homesick easily.. and supposing that it happened, I'd tend to feel ill at ease, restless, anxious, unsafe..  you name it. It always had to do with 'worry'. I'd grizzle to myself of home, family, friends, and some sort of other things. And it co-occurred with having to cower away from the biggest fear I could not bear to even imagine; being lost. It's just too embarrassingly funny to see these listed as I express on. You might have literally think of me whining "I wanna go home," prematurely. Honestly, I wouldn't care of whining, but damn, I wished for why I would.



For years, I've been getting these all manner of weeny problems towards being not around hometown. It was and had been my childhood fear, when a little I was, who found himself in a place crowded with locals and felt deserted because he wasn't like one of them. Cunning and compelling questions became so many and began to stray within the juvenile's mind of his. Stricken by fright, he clutched his mother's hand tighter so that he knew he'd feel safer in a more dependable and firmer touch while hoping that her contact won't fail him.


But then again, things like these began to feel as if it relented itself to appear less daunting than how usually it serves..



Because I've figured ways to retain myself from such dismays. Realizing that mere excuses aren't supposed to be reasons for all the grouching towards this guiltless voyage, it's credibly astounding that it's not that hard to be able to retaliate the fright that discourages any further way. As the matter of fact, it's never wise to put down what the possible prospects may have pledged for your salutary anticipations that you've put aside.



The solemn mind that popped into my head tried its best to console myself and remarkably, it worked the hell out of me. Resolution like this would have persisted my ever-growing will from having it scarred from such imbecility.



Hiatus; the warm water shower and the cold dawn air agitated my senses, my mind was now in absolute ease and somewhat traced a slight progression already. It's as if you've learned something already. Even though it, the vacation, hasn't started yet, it seemed like it's about to begin.



I checked, and certainly it has.



I reach for my packed luggage, dash down the stairway and unite with my parents. With earnest, I pray for a safe trip as I close my eyes and sharply exhale the anxiety in exchange with the breathtaking adventure that awaits, right after hopping into the vehicle gracefully for departure.

Vague inklings

I bought a one way ticket

cause I knew I'd never see the ground

unless I was aboard a jet plane, and we were going down

  

When I wiped the tears from my eyes,

the warm water took me by surprise

and I woke up beside the ocean, I realized..

I must be in California. 

Well...... Not really California. And yes, it was just, again, a vision

Lately, back into my daydreaming, I was still in the chill-breeze-ill state, like it was as if I gagged myself with dry ice in the middle of a nowhere desert. But enough of that, anyways. So I was cold, and I've been having like two or three perpetual dreams I've ever had so far. All held out and eventually put them all out as a whole as it resumes.


There was this pyramid that involved, it was as if a mere festive occurring amidst an undergoing pilgrimage. There were people. Civilised-looking people. I repeatedly questioned myself if it was day or night. Can't really say when, where, or what it really was but there wasn't anything religious reviewing back in there so I guess it's one safe dream it seems hehe.

But the thing is! I dreamt of You. In there! yeah. The gist of all was that there was a changing back in the view of how I see you. It's as if.. you came out of a closet and abruptly, i see you in a different light. Somewhat, there was a salutary alteration in a reverie itself.

In my dream, we had to hug. There was a little strong affection going on in between those very tiny bits of other things in ourselves. It was such an awkward task that was told from someone of somewhere, somewhere like a place deep inside that we both might have been familiar with. Was it.. ...? I would JUST hope you have the similar notion as what I have in mind as well.

Afterwards that wonderment, the time held back from elapsing

Out of the blue, you applied your unbearably devotion.

 you seemed committed to some purpose, yearningly

Feelings of an ardent love I would have conceive you have shown

You were just.. smiling. Kept on smiling.

And finally. Everything started to feel numb. I couldn't feel your arms anymore. 

Exaggeratedly, your scent I sensed slowly fades away.

Then in a flash,

I've met myself alone again. Fully unmesmerized from my rest.

Yes. I was pretending you were there again. Like the times when you were still there. Like how I would even see you in downtown and in the cities. Your hair swayed, increasing my attention, and coincidently at the same time when I actually needed somebody like you. Your eyes gaining irresistibility, I never wanted to take away the sight that it seemed so darting in a way to me. I wonder so awfully, the beauty that lies beyond that eyes. If that's already seductive, then I wonder how colourful the scene your heart portray. A scene with the colours evincing those indefinite picturesque reverence of yours that anybody or anyone wouldn't even bear to fully agnize those incoherent means of love, except for those sincerely ones who has the true will, able to empathize the sweet, tender value.

 I even fear if there was actually a list for that, because, I've fallen to my face in shame of failure and unnecessarily expelled by the urge of my dignity. But optimistically, I still have one slim chance left to resolve.

Somehow, I strongly wish and feel like bringing back those old times and probably take a chance with you back home. If there was a myth that broke out, introducing the occult itself to me, and grant its magical abilities of some sort regarding time. I honestly will risk it all by all means for you.

How long has it been like this? 

The longing of you actually brings out rather uncanny dreams to me 

and it seems to be bringing itself to an upmost new level, 

that it triggers the realization in myself..

and I don't need to elaborate myself
there's no need for questioning anymore

as I already know

the answer lies ahead,

What's there without you here?

                                                                .............. nothing..

Exactly.

Parting

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I just woke up actually. At this time.

11.32pm

                                                This meaaaaaaaaaaaaaans,

                                                A long night waiting ahead of me. Again.

I hope I didn't jynxed that though. But, heh, I can care less anyway! 

Oh. So I was just taking a nap earlier. Cause if my limbs weren't stiff and tired I wouldn't be so much of in fatigue and take a rest stop at the WRONG TIME. Yeah. I slept in the evening around 8 and woke up around 11. So..

when I actually realized that after I woke up..

I've become like one of this guy right there.
For some absolute no comprehend-able idea why

Even now I feel like it's morning. And although I might think that would sound weird but if I told you that I felt so good and refreshed and say that I felt like today's a morning after that then... you might call it at precise rate that it may sound double as it is weird for me to say.



Oh, and I've never had too much of the 'morning freshness' every time I woke up from bed. But simply, right now and still, I've felt it like it was morning a while ago. Wouldn't it be nice when you woke up from the bed and still wearing your favourite jeans that after you overworked it with a lot of walking and running with your friends, hanging around in the mall? Well, it does for me.. and that usually happens when I was out like a light.

And finally it was now for me to tell you that I just had a hangout with my dear friends in the Mall and went to watch a movie and just.. roam around the community. The fact that has been known by hard about how it is unlikely possible to meet each other again.. or meeting each other with our school uniforms ever again. It's sad as it will cease. But, I say that, we all human beings with feelings to stumble around with the resolution to this matter in addition, should actually bear the consequences whether it's a pitiful side in the other hand or a pleasing side. Mostly would actually find it saddening, I do not know for people so malefic tend to have for someone's back. 

Anywho, I can't express on so much about how I will miss the people that I've longed studied with. The people that I've longed enjoying jokes and interesting chats with. The people that I've longed savour for the long upcoming exemption alongside. The people that I've longed for to celebrate with after the aftermath of what we have longed to study for, with the merriment of joy. Because when the final exams are over, we earn our treasures truthfully and finally; Freedom. And often not much of people would initially think about the fears towards the fact about unable to see each other again any longer, in a hefty, packed, full combination of ourselves, a group, a team, and safe to call it, as a class.

As much to how saddening it is to me inside. I fear for them as they would part ways as I will, I would be missing them too. I have been spending a lot of times with the ones I cherish my time with. Most of them are just as equal to me. They're my friends if you know the heck I'm saying.
 I love you all, too much, I'll talk excessive crazy things..

Sometimes. 

Yeah. As soon as it's over. We'll part ways and have it our own ways.

And now's the time.

Dear Friends,

I'll miss you

Antiseptics are antagonists to my anti-anaesthesia-ism

3.23am.

Woke up with a sudden realization after several doses of pills and antiseptics taken from this afternoon.

Trembling, I saw my hands when I raised them to see it for myself; cold and agitated. My head perspired and mouth laid open to take adequate amount of air while I felt my heart for a while. It was almost thumping on its most irregular basis, unfavourable to my neck and shoulders that kept on juddering, the causes in addition to my cough-aches. My throat, that seem like I'm swallowing daggers, distressingly inducing the pain to my whole self and which seems to be the most vital torturing part of my illness today.

Yes, I've got colds.

I soon figured that I've been going through these a lot of times. I know how the usual occurrences take place and the ones might causing dismay to my inner self, though it's quite obscured to any person's sight. I never tend to deliberately do so unless it's an anguish so terrible and unbearable, then I've might.



But what I should actually say is that I'm quite in a decent mood right now. My throat soothed and made me feel a little less weak now. But I still do need to continue resting for the sake of recovery. There's nobody in the house that's still up in this early dawn but still, I'm not even afraid of anything. I've got will and myself alone, to write about now whilst me drinking my milo which was hot and left on this table before I slept. I even got my medicine ready right here. Very awful. I don't intent to even look at it by the sight of its dreadful bitterness and a shockingly foul taste to my taste buds.

But obliged, this is the only way for me to get back on to my feet, ready and steady. And also this helps me to put myself into sleep, although that sounded detrimental towards my sleeping habit. Though there are no other words for 'nocturnal' in terms with the means of science, so I pretty guess I'll name it 'anti-anaesthesia-ism'.


I'll get back soon enough. With exactly two more papers to go for this O' levels. Freedom in just 4 or 3 more days to go and finally we all get to do something fun like we don't care anymore. Exciting. Fun. Everyone's talking about it. But I surely don't know which ones to start with after I've earned mine. My list are as messy as my room is.

So until then. I'll update furthermore sooner.

I'm quite exhausted for now. Good 'dawn' ! :)

November

"3 days and a quarter", the calendar seemed to assure me.


 ..because of heard and said that almost half of the things we've studied long for are done and are left with the other half to cramp our head and bum in the exam room for hours.





So I was in the car earlier, from school. And then I realized that today, it's almost November. The eleventh month of the year. Back earlier I was thinking about counting the days left until the exams are all over and think about the reward we will earn to rest for. November, a moment to not only to pleasure the fact about the end of our Examination but, to me, it is that month where I find it something recollective. The thoughts, it was a lot of them, usually when November comes near.


In that November. Things, they stayed present and auspicious to any other person in there. The moments, they came as if they were incoming, very impending, so shrewed in deception. Then you, coincidently caught within a thin glance, you were actually there. Like leaves so vulnerable to a gust. You were able to be met. Able to be seen. Able to be found when I approached so gladly and joyous through the crowds when you were still there. Until that November when everyone was able to dismiss and depart, tears broke out in everyone's eyes and none did I felt a damp on my face except, inside, the shatters for it was my heart.

And just this year, when the first time I came. I couldn't just believe my eyes.

How long has it been?

Five years? Six years?

..cause you've blossomed into a very beautiful woman

But you know what scarred me.. ?
Your absence.
The mark would never heal.

but anyways..

As if I would count...

I don't usually count time, but I do always guess things a lot of times (not time). And for some reason besides seldom disliking for being a mathe-maniac, I just don't know why. I guess this is how I roll. As just as I felt, in just a few days, November comes. I wonder what more could bring in my castle-in-the-air-ing or perhaps miracles would happen when it's time.



Though as far as I am concerned, I enjoyed remembering about you from mentioning this into my Blogger and will always do remember you when I have that endless possibility to ever see you again!

Though anyways!

I've always wondered if you were reading too :)

Where I Was

 -now playing: "The Bird and The Worm"-


                                                      ~ You and I
                                                      have left our troubles far behind
                                                      But I still have just one more question on my mind

                                      For all my friends who live in the oceans and the seas ~

                                      with fronds like these, well who need anemones? 

Wait a minute,

Did I say friends from the oceans and seas ..... o.o

Oh! Don't mind me, I was just singing a song while cleaning up my documents and files in this computer. I can guess it is as messy as my room right here. Hahaha.



So I've kept a lot of pictures and musics and other stuffs in folders. I have this habit of trying to put all of my possessions and some treasured ones in one place but failed to. And one of reasons that made it like that was I merely have a clue to use that I-don't-know-whatever auto-sort button where you can "stack" and or bundle them up into "groups". And anything else that offered me to use these buttons were to no avail as I tried to make use of them...

Clearly, I'm not that kind of a computer whiz, I confess xD

But anyway, enough of that. I've also found those old pictures that I kept in there. Most of them were blurred images and some are candids taken by my Nokia xpressmusic and I still am happy to have them saved!




But now.. I don't know whether I should keep them or just throw it away. :(
My laptop's memory space needs a bit of .... yeah, space.. before it gets laggier soon.

And I don't feel like throwing these away. Each of them has a reason to be shot. And I don't feel like expressing the value it all has to me to you right now... maybe one day I'll explain. I guess. :p

So....................................................

I'll leave Blogger for now with these here..

              

Weekdays' are coming again.

A set of busy days for some of you would encounter any soon.

But anyway I hope you're all well and feeling fine                  
and prepared for I don't know you guys are in for                     

xD

Right now I feel like I have the urge to go sky diving one day...
I would say.

-------------

Sky Pilot Ryde-R

Signing out!

-------------

Good Evening! :)

Alone on the outside. So tired of looking in.

When you're down and feel alone.. what would you do?

Or how about if you're as if you've swallowed yourself in a cold, deep room..?


A room so vague, everything was there to convince
you with an unknown resolute determination
of some sort. You don't even know it's coming..


..And you almost had no other way out

 well it's not my room

I'm referring to........ 

Inquiries.

                             they're in my head....

                             why are they even in my head?

                             and how were they even possible

                             to exist in there.. in that time?

                                          

I swear I wasn't sleeping at that time..
Unbearable, 
I perceived it was something notional

Though, during my sleeps..

I would have let my mind sail

off to an empty space where wonder lies beyond

but Ironically.

                 there came the questions again...

                          unwilling to let inside, they flutter in my sleep

                          causing to clutter all around the

                          messed decisions I tried so hard 

                          pondering about through that night..

                          and even in my dream,
                          I was put upon by these...

which in turn the following morning would

end up me feeling all unhappy and sagged..

 

This sucks..
I don't want this
                         .....Please leave me.




Oh! Hello glowing Sun... a Happy Morning to you...

I like Green and Blue and a little bit of You

I'm all lightened!

So you've seen it.

I guess I'll stay a little bit whitey with this cool new template and background I've put on.

I even put up a new picture above! This picture signifies the scene I would view myself as I listen to the very first song I've heard from Adam Young's  Rainbow Veins  :)

In the vast mind of his inspiring creativity and optimism towards the Earth.

Adam,

you're one great songwriter I've ever known right now.

It'll be a remembrance for that line situated in the picture itself too! One of those reason why I've used the name 'Streetlights' for almost everything of my possessions

And if you did realize the green fonts, whenever you hover them it turns blue! 

Hehe :) Green and Blue.. my favourite. Reminds me of my room...

And this picture right here!

lovely isn't it?

it's just about to remind me of You    :)

I never lost you

Yesterday..
                   ..was the 22th of October of the year 2010


I witnessed a night that day would occur in about a few hours later before that clock struck past 12 midnight. With a few prayers quietly said in my small heart and my eyes closed hoping to be truly granted, I wish for another beautiful, delightful and great humble year to welcome my beloved dearest one.

Happy 57th birthday,

Babu <3

And I still immensely am feeling glad of having you around. My whole heart would crash down and topple over from my soul. Just as how the ocean waves would end up crashing along a shore so hostile. The white-casts that formed, that slowly fades. Just as how my spirit would be as sorrow swept over me. Frightened, I might not know if time would even ease the pain away... if it hurts that bad....

So I agreed to arrange for that evening. 

I've hoped it would bring a great deal of merriment for the dinner itself we've planned for you.

 

I just really hope you're happy :)

...I always never wanted to lose you...

Alleviate

3:31am. Sitting up. Listening to songs. Sooner or later I'll be carried away and therefore the clock would surely almost pass to dawn.

If this table lamp continues to illumine this solitary night, it would seem mockingly depriving my needs to rest for I already knew sleeping is, officially, hopeless for a problematic youngster like myself.

cause insomnia strikes again.

It's amazing.
..well, not totally that amazing



 of how I don't get much attention to myself and wouldn't rather be sleeping in bed for even just twice a day. Last year, I used to take, at a usual rate, a preposterously 5 and a slightly bits of fitful hours each day. During those other hours was me sitting and daydreaming, neglecting those homeworks and tasks I was ought to complete and hand it in to school the next few days.


That, I would blame the dull late nights that kept occurring to me. Obliging myself or to put myself to sleep doesn't work either way. Somehow, I actually thought of a belief ; The Law of Sleeping. It might be that sleeping is supposed to be a natural thing to put people to their subconscious state, and then sleeping happens. I don't know for some people, they might find it easy to fall asleep. They won't have to worry since those people are light sleepers. Well, possibly they find it advantageous or the opposite. It could be a same thing for someone the opposite like oh, I don't know. A heavy sleeper like me I guess?

and needless for me to say,
it isn't awkward to see I haven't changed that much.

Also, late nights were spent playing routinely the only game I loved with my bro - Fiesta. Whenever he's not available I might still be capable of staying up but those times were before I get accustomed to be like a nightwatcher. That was kind of an inside codename to refer to my brother. And I am guessing he still bears that title when I actually heard him sneeze in the next room! hahaha.


And so this year, I stopped that game ever since February. Not only the good quality of the internet of ours discourages any further use but the 'O' levels as well. One of the clearly proved reasons to put a stop to this unwanted habit.

And now bad habits seemed to be one of the most things

that I can't handle amidst my tasks to be done with

along with the other things I simply want to do

I have to put an end to this
...But it keeps getting into me
Maybe I should just lessen it
...I know I believe I can



There was one said...

Sacrifices can be only mean losing something
but from my point of view, people does that to 
bring upon a good cause.

and even if sacrificing something good

for a slightly bad cause and a better cause

would be also a wise thing to do.

And so.. I might be finding the time for me to miss the nights. 

and probably enjoy a bit of a 

new change.

I found most early mornings are so pleasant at its fullest
and now I hope I'll be welcomed if I happen to visit them lots of time.

And I know it's not ALWAYS a bad thing to stay up late, depends on the conditions. With the experience of frequently being up late could be a good use for a person who actually has the dire need to maybe finish a homework? Hehe. Though, despite the feedbacks for the morning mood later, at least you get it done with! :P

Woop! It's 5am.

I should sleep now~ 

Goodbye now, and good mornings to the insomniacs and morning shiners all around!

:)

Tensions enclosed. Memories be recalled

Wow

Firstly,
I'd like to say, gladly, that I'm still alive after encountering that couple of exam papers ever since the time that I started to realize it's here and now.

But I'm quite comfortable besides the pressure right now. I'm enjoying this left-over spaghetti that was from this morning. Heheheheh. It's so cheeeeeeeeeezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzie, I would fight for it to have it finished :F

Anyway!

So it had came to my attention that there were many things that happened here and there. There had been a lot since then. Before, we've had that celebrations symbolising the ending day of our school classes, and the day after was the starting of our study leave. I couldn't feel anymore pleased than to recall how amazing it was that day.



Misty eyes, there were on every each of our faces -- well, most of us had the joy is the least I can remember. Spending every last minute to meet friends in a class-grouped form was anyone's least task to complete before it's too late. I've imagined how it all went before it did, and by majority; everyone have probably hid those sorrow feelings inside. I did the same too. Weeping would be an optional, but holding it out would hurt much more. I should hold this in until later, I mused. So I started giving regards before the time we part ways to journey on own.



The fact how everyone was about to miss the hours of classes that gave us the strains. The hours of classes that we've slacked off. The hours of classes that we've put so much efforts on to, we were nearly dead by then. The hours of classes we've had our lovely teachers causing us to gag ourselves with laughter. Yes, the fact about those, it's gonna end...


Well, we still do have some extra classes just right before an exam starts. Tomorrow would be the last to see our English Language teacher; Miss Yin, in class. This is going to be sad...


A lil' bit of her. She's one my favourite persons in my school life. She had been the most caring towards us ever since we were her first Class Teacher - that was last year, but still it seems to me that she's still the one courteous Class Teacher that I've had.



I'll leave these pictures here.
I'll remember these as much as I can.
Until another day would hurl me with its pang of anxiety again.

I wish you all well, until then.

Hope to see you all again!

And I wear specs now.

I can see you now!

Let time be elapsed for any good causes

uh...

Ohai!

What might be the stupidest thing to a sensible person happened was that yesterday's glance at something on one of the tuition tables. I clearly didn't expect anything else to brighten me up that night, except for the usual serenity I can listen to from the playlists in my cellphone.

The moment I opened the door numbered "6", and as I drew my hands off from rubbing my jaded eyes, I beheld a remarkable sight drawn at a precisely large scale; A table with an outline of two bean-like shaped drawing, somewhat familiar, where in the center of it says:

 PLACE BUTT

HERE

I find it awkward being from an anxious state, cause I was sleeping and slacking all day at home, to a feeling where I practically laugh as hysterically as how hard I could have hurt my ribs, trying to retain my composure.

I was lucky that nobody heard me being a complete maniac in the tiny room.

It wasn't epic - honestly said. 

It was just like an inside joke of mine :P but wow, that really cracked me up all of the sudden. And I really pray everyday for that it would start off with a bright day each day :)

Anyway! I should start getting back to my revisions. This maths is getting onto my nerves :|

Foreseeing Sights

I

Am

Bored :(

Saturday is so lonely and dull here at home. And by what I meant home, I meant my room.. 

This morning really bothered me, my dad barged into my room twice to ask if there's school or not. For a reason, I said there isn't. So I went back to sleep and hope to resume the dream that I was having once again. 

The second time was because he was unsure. From that point, I began to feel irritated.

A bad start to start off a day, again, I went back to sleep and regretted that I woke up later than expected.

Grrrr

Oh and recently I was trying to revise intensively but I can't help to slack intermittently. There is no point if I can't focus on a certain topic to understand and practice or memorize.. And in the end, my room would look like as messy as myself right now.. but then.

I glanced at this for a while when I was browsing along the Internet.

Then turned behind to look through the window..

and wished that's how it would look like when

looking out from my small bedroom window.......

(and I think that's in England)

I always wonder what lies outside... I've always wondered so many things in my completely enclosed mind.

Thinking that I would visit places like Australia or maybe somewhere cold, Alaska. Or how about climbing up the Mount Everest and taste the snow peaks. 

Or probably just go take an elevator up to an Eiffel Tower to see how high I can get to.

Height isn't an enemy to me, although they seem hostile, but I figured that they can be merciful enough at times to allow us to fly and glide away. I bet this would be so much better.

..Like an eagle :)

Daily posts Fail

Ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff..

whew.

Well, first of all, YES! I procrastinated again :x

From my previous post which I've put up almost two weeks ago, I can see how occupied I was during that days that had elapsed. Thus I couldn't be annoyed to blog for a bit, Furthermore, I can say that the O' level exams are just less than 3 weeks now.... I am scared, but I'll be faithful.. 

and a few days before that two weeks before, I was doing that 30-day challenge. 

Which...

I was supposed to post about stuffs daily..........

but now, it's a......

F A I L

Oh well, it doesn't even matter anyway.

The only funny thing was to realize that

I was determined at finishing that challenge within a month-time

but, heh..

I never expected that I would.

uh..............

and I don't know why I posted this with this picture...

hehehehehehehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehhe  :D

So all I'm saying is! ..It's okay to procrastinate.

UNLESS it's something significant..
I suggest.. do try your best and get it done with

Not saying that you shouldn't do anything else
but to complete that task of yours

(unless you WANT to)

I'd respect that if you would want that anyway.....

I can guess that

Not everyone can multi-task. Not even me :)

So bear that in mind that Rudi says;

"Procrastinating is one of those humane things to do, unintentionally"

Oh and so, Hi Bloggers :) !

Day 03

I've been procrastinating a lot of these challenges.

And hopefully I'll be back on the track! :D

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Day 03

A picture of you and your friends

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well, I don't have a group picture where all of my friends are in it

So I'll be posting em like this :D

.

Meet Jim,
He's cool,

The passion he has in him,

are things like music, especially rock n roll.

A dreamer to be persistent in his

guitar skills and willfully hope to learn more of his self disclosure.

I can tell whenever we jam together and it became so often, we both become closer and better at it 

I'm glad that we've gone through this far and 

damn sure!

we can be band buddies if you'd wish me to fulfill your dreams.

  

c:

And I guess you all knew Sal before.

I hope..  xD

He's an elegant person, I should say. 

He also does a quite a good judging when asked from his opinion.

Tolerant, and tends to have sanguine point of views and

even, to me, an authorized fellow to be called.. 'shy' 

Well.. seldom.

:P

Well everyone has their own personal thoughts to share with, right?? 

In a group of people that he knows, he CAN be hyperactive.

Without knowing when and where the occurrences are, I assure you..

It always has to do with one or more light-hearted and humourous conversation

heheheheheheh :P No worries. I love those too.

And who may this pink-dressed, alluring, bubbly girl here?

Well, this is Lyel,
...Marinella Lyel Oca Iballa



She has this crazy, wild combination of interests.


Ella..
is an overzealous lover of The Beatles and their music.

Also a fanatic over J.K Rowling's stories that includes..

Hogwarts,
Witchcrafts and Wizardry,
Imagination and wonder,

...and Daniel Radcliffe..

Ever since the day I knew she's abhorrent to cute fishes,
it was also the day we both started to blend in to know each other.

.......blend in like a vanilla shake ;D

Her attitude can be as loud as her loudest belching sound ever made,

and that she even achieved The Loudest Female Burp Award.

NO MATTER HER SIZE.

One of her hobbies is also

to be intimate with my Mom.. and get PHYSICAL!

( *Put Ben's pelvis thrust here* )

Well, I guess that's two hobbies, wouldn't it? :P

And not forgetting her baby bf over here!

From Aime, through Avie, to Kapten Spiff, then back to Aime!

A songwriter; and she makes 'em ones really lovely and cheesy :)

A part-time sport enthusiast,

A part-time journalist,

and a full-time starver for happiness and love

 

...I guess :P

I sometime see her as a hippie; a girl who loves the nature a lot!
She's care-free

an outdoor lover,

an Indie music lover :)

Well basically. She's all in for love love love!

and I have to say, she has really good taste of  music.


Sometime I even dreamt of her being in a submarine on a French Jersey with red shorts.
Epic, I long for a moment where she will be popular with lots of her good songs, compiled with serene music.

and someday..
I really would want to have a duet and sing along the songs while we cherish them with fond.

And it might be pretty :)

I guess, that's pretty much everyone that I can talk about for now.

I love them all sincerely and I hope we all can stay longer throughout the end.

Anyways, I'll post these other pictures just for a remembrance. And I'll be posting more about my friends at another day.

Until then,

I wish you all a good day!